I can help you face emotional problems, deal with negative aspects of the past and face the future in the healthiest manner possible. My role is to help you understand how you have ‘become you’ and to offer different perspectives on your current situation. This can help you become a better version of yourself and to change your experience of life. For instance, I might help you to:
I worked as a human resources specialist in development training and organisational change. I helped leaders to understand the more subtle aspects of change and coached individuals in coping with what was going on. It was twenty years of working with change, in dozens of organisations that woke me up to the truth that, ‘When people get into groups, they act out their family stuff.’ My work experience also includes time at the Environment Agency – a job I got because of my interest in sustainability, and with Outward Bound – where I started many years ago, combining my fascination with psychology and my love of the outdoors.
Psychotherapy is a profound conversation about you, so my job is to listen deeply and to create the space in which you can discover what’s really going on. Each therapeutic relationship is unique, and to some extent we have to work it out together. I will work collaboratively with you in a joint exploration of where you are and who you are becoming.
I will ask questions to deepen your enquiry, I’ll help you join the dots and offer you a psychological perspective when useful. Sometimes I’ll reflect back to you something you’ve said so that you can ponder its meaning a little longer. Sometimes I’ll notice how we’re relating in the moment and get curious about how this is happening. If you need to express strong emotions, I’ll be the caring witness. Always, I’ll be present and I’ll validate your experience in a non-judgmental way.
Our earliest relationships give shape to how we manage our emotions – we can discover the origins of our personality, own our ‘stuff’ and find some peace with our history.
The origins of suffering are essentially craving and aversion; and the alleviation of suffering comes through self-awareness and acceptance, which lead to compassion.
There is a deep seated, less conditioned self that is fundamentally OK, healthy and deserving of happiness – our ‘brilliant sanity.’
All wounding happens in relationship; healing relationships help you let go of wounding.
It’s likely that epigenetic changes are happening as a result of therapy and ‘plasticity’ allows us to empower new neural pathways and even renew tissues.
Personal change is serious work and finding the lighter side often helps us along the way.